Della's Decision — New Voodou

Della became a widow on her 35th wedding anniversary. On the Fourth of July in 1921, she snuck off to the icehouse on the edge of town to elope with Tom Liss. On the Fourth of July in 1956, she lost Tom after a long illness. At 58 she was not sure what she would do.

She met Tom when she was working at the Butte Barber Supply, where the handsome, young barber had come to buy shaving cream and razors. She was taken with him from their first meeting. Tom was charmed by Della as well. She was attractive, smart and had a fine-tuned sense of humor. How she could tell a story.

After their marriage, she quit working, staying at home to take care of Tom, who could be as demanding as he was charming. Within a few years she was raising two high-spirited children, Tom junior and Mary Kay. Tom proved to be an excellent provider, successfully turning his barbering business into a beauty salon that thrived throughout the depression. The combination of his good looks and talent attracted a loyal following. All those boyish bobs and Marcel waves meant Della never worried about money.

In the 1930's Tom hired a crew of Butte boys with the Civilian Conservation Corps to build a log cabin at Echo Lake. Della and the children, along with her family and close friends would spend entire summers—Memorial Day to Labor Day—at the cabin. The kids learned to swim and fish while warm-hearted Della and the other mothers took care of everyone and everything in the rough woods' environment. They cooked big communal suppers, instigated card games, and tolerated general shenanigans. On the weekends when the men joined their families, there were lively parties complete with bootlegged whiskey and cigars.

Nancy and Jimmy with Jim at Tom and Della’s home.

Years later, after Mary Kay married and started a family and Tom junior began his career in international mining, it was the grandchildren, Nancy and Jimmy, who filled their days. Della made kid friendly meals and cakes in her kitchen while Tom built toys for them in his basement workshop. When Tom's health began to fail, Della dedicated her days to his care and comfort. And then he was gone.

Helen and Della dressed for lunch and shopping downtown

For the first months, she busied herself with Mary Kay and the children, her sister Helen, and a close circle of friends. She thought she could find a way forward in familiar territory. Then in a surprise at the new year, Mary Kay's husband, Jim, announced that he had accepted a job as a civilian employee at the Marine Base near Barstow, California. He would go out immediately and the family would follow once the house was sold and living arrangements near the base were secured.

Della lived whole life in Butte except for one trip to the 1933 Chicago World's Fair and Oshkosh, Wisconsin to meet Tom's family and another to Los Angeles to visit her sisters Marion and Kay years when Mary Kay was a schoolgirl. Now the thought of continuing to live alone in Butte without her family was too disheartening.

Della didn't really feel old, and she would not let herself be defeated. Once she had been bold and decisive, running off with Tom in defiance of her parents. What happened to that spirited woman? Could she find that sense of adventure again? And where would she go? It had been years since Della had made a decision based solely on her own needs and wants.

Her son Tom invited her to Salt Lake City to live with him and his Chilean wife, but her intuition told her moving in with the newlywed couple was a bad idea. Marion suggested that she come to Los Angeles, she and Kay would make room for her in their apartment and help her get situated. Mary Kay and her family would only be a few hours away.

That spring she boarded the Union Pacific Sky Chief with Mary Kay and the children, who got off in Las Vegas where Jim was waiting for them. She continued to Los Angeles where she would sleep on the Murphy bed in her sisters' living room. By the time her family visited a few months later, Della had dusted off her secretarial skills, found a job as a stenographer. She looked years younger as she chatted and laughed with her witty sisters.